Wednesday, July 01, 2009

A Deep Dark Time

Father God, I've just entered into one of the deepest darkest times that a person can go through.
Life as I know it has changed. Things will never be the same. I will never be the same.
I am broken.
Where are you? Where are you when my life is falling apart?
I can no longer smile. I can no longer be happy.
I am broken.
What am I to do? How am I to go on?
You are supposed to be The Comforter...The Father...The Great I AM, but where are you?
Why all the pain? Why all of the suffering? How can you let these things happen?
I am broken.
I act strong. I pretend not to be bothered, but on the inside I am a sensitive girl that can only take so much pain, and I've reached my limit.
I am quiet, and keep things to myself until I explode in hurt, and pain and anger...yet my heart is exploding now.
Has your heart ever hurt? I mean physically. Have you ever felt your heart hurt? I know what it feels like. Every thought feels like a knife twisting in my heart.
I am broken.
Fix me. Put me back together. Heal me oh God, for I cannot do it on my own any longer. I've tried. You know I've tried. But I've failed. I'm a failure once again.
Give me strength, for I am weak and feel there is no fight left in me. Give me something to fight for. Give me a reason to fight, a reason to go on.
Become the core of who I am, the center of my universe. Be the one I can count on when I can count on no one else.
Make things right. Make me right. Heal me. Love me.
For, I am broken.


  1. I'm so sorry you are going through this. I am going to call you later. If you need anything let me know

  2. My heart is breaking when I read your words. I hate that you are hurting and I want to take it away. I want to help you or at least be here for you. Please know that I am.

  3. I'm so sorry you are having a hard time. I'm praying for you and your family. If you need to talk or need anything else, just let me know.

  4. Father God,
    Please wrap your loving arms around Kristen. Bring her peace and wholeness in you.

    You tell us in your word, Lord, that your strength is perfected in our weakness and that when we come to you with a heavy burden, you will put your yolk upon us and our burden will be light.

    Lord, remind us all that in this world we will find trouble, but we can overcome the world through your spirit in us. If we seek your will even in the hard times, we will emerge stronger in the end.

    I pray that whatever difficulty Kristen is facing, she will direct her thoughts and actions toward you, seeking you and your will and following your guidance for her life. Fill her with your light and spirit, Lord and make her paths straight. I pray that when she has emerged from this darkness into your light, she will give you all the glory for your mighty hand in her life.


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